


Just Enough

by Alemeino



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: @Kustard, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Depression, How Do I Tag, Implied multiple suicide attempts, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Suicide Attempt, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-25
Updated: 2018-06-25
Packaged: 2019-05-28 08:31:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15044966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alemeino/pseuds/Alemeino
Summary: Often times Red has asked himself what was the point? Who would care if he existed. But looking into the darkness, he remembers one person who might just miss him.





	Just Enough

Waterfall was often famous for the eerie silence it held, no matter the universe. For how still everything was and the only sound heard was the crashing of water. Even the rain was often silent as it struck down on puddles. Red would know, know how the smallest droplets made by opening umbrellas would echo loudly through the caverns. How small footsteps seemed to sound throughout all of the area. But he was more familiar with the Waterfall dump where water fell down to an unknown dark abyss. How there seemed to be some sort of deathly chill in the subterranean atmosphere whenever he stood on the edge, only needing a step to fall down to wherever the water may end. 

Red chuckled, already having lost count of how many times he had come all the way here, how many times he had stood on the edge, staring off into the darkness, wondering what might be down there. His kept his chuckling low, as if to not alert any of the residents of his presence, which was the least thing he wanted to do.

He had done it once more. Once more he burdened someone he cared for with his own pathetic bullshit. Once more he couldn't control his goddamn emotions and ended up not only pushing him away, but hurting him as well. Red was just tired, tired of being a burden, tired of being worthless, tired of being weak and pathetic. Just tired of being alive.

He kept staring down, eyelights not moving or faltering as they stared deeper into the dark, endless abyss. Just one step, that was all it took. Just one step over the edge, one step into nothingness and then sweet, sweet release. No one would ever have to deal with his shit anymore and heck if what mostly everyone said was true, heck he would probably even be forgotten. And what did he even have to live for anyways?

His brother? The same bastard that reminded him how much of a piece of shit he was, how worthless and pathetic he always acted. Heck Boss would probably throw the biggest celebration that he didn't have to deal with his weak and lazy ass brother anymore. 

Chillby? Why would the fire head even care for a customer who failed to pay his tab? Who walked in and ate food for free, not even paying the hardworking bartender. Chillby will probably be happy he didn't have to deal with giving free food to some unimportant monster.

The lady behind the door? Well now that was an exuse. They didn't even know each other's names! Much less what they even looked like. The woman probably has a life already and he doubted she would cry over jokes. Heck give it a week or two and she would completely forget about him.

Sans..?

At this point Red's untied shoelaces were dangling over the edge, the skeleton too far in his thoughts to realize how he had inches closer to the ledge. Would Sans care? Would he notice? Would he miss him? He wouldn't right. Sans would probably be happy... Right?

Doubts began flooding his mind and hell did Red want to block them all out, want to extinguish them and get on with it. Sans would be happy right? He wouldn't have to deal with his stupid depression or anxiety and panic attacks. He wouldn't be a weight upon the other's shoulder, adding up to Sans' own problems. Yet, deep in his own soul he knew Sans would care, knew the other would feel guilty and feel like he wasn't enough when he is.

God if Red could only tell Sans how he was more than what he deserved, how he was the only reason he didn't give up already and the only person in his shitty life that actually pushed him to continue. To not give up. That showed him there was more to his life and that more was Sans. And, if he were to be honest, part of him felt selfish. Selfish for wanting to repay all the hard work Sans did to help him, to support him, by throwing it down the drain and not changing a single bit. 

He sighed, knowing this was the reason why he always came here yet still returned home. Still returned to Sans. He slowly turned, burrying his hands deeper into his pockets as he shuffled his feet in the water, his shoelaces soggy and splutted with every step he took. Maybe not today, or at least not yet. For now he needed to keep going, needed to just hold on to hope and look on the bright side, no matter how small or how far it is. And besides-

Sans would come looking soon.

**Author's Note:**

> Hewwo!!! Finally posted something here! Uh, yeah I love Kustard fight me. I know this is horrible and shitty af but oh well I got nothing to do here anyways. Probably gonna post more shit cuz, why not? And if ya have requests or anything don't be afraid to comment!
> 
> And death threats are also welcomed my peeps.


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